Soarin' and Soarin' and Soarin' Some More

As the off-season continues, hubby and I continue to take advantage of it. After all, what's the good of living in Celebration if you can't make good use of your Disney World proximity?

We achieved the pinnacle yesterday when, through a judicious combination of Fastpasses and the standby line, we managed to ride Soarin' an amazing 13 times. We slipped in Spaceship Earth, Nemo, Turtle Talk, and two or three rounds on Test Track, but Soarin' was our main focus. The others were simply filler between Fastpass times when standby got too long.

We hadn't actually planned a marathon. Our original idea was to head out to Epcot just after rope drop, grab a few Soarin's till the line got too long and the Fastpasses got to far apart, then have a nice lunch and head home. What we didn't realize was that the line wasn't going to get unreasonable until the evening and that the Fastpass times would move slowly enough for us to use and abuse them for most of the day.

When we got there, the Soarin' line was an unheard of 15-20 minutes. I generally won't do it if it's any longer than that. It's not just the wait; I hate hate hate the interactive games on the wall screens. The line is already wide enough for an entire football team to pass through side-by-side, which is a major enabler for line jumpers. Add in the games and the jumping gets worse as people slip ahead under the guise of "playing" or "moving in front of the screen." Sprinkle a generous helping of people flailing madly (that's how you play...for example, one of the games is to pop ballons or blobs of some sort, and you have to act out the motions), and you've got a recipe for disaster. I don't like being bumped into by inattentive strangers who can't stand for more than 5 minutes without some sort of stimulation. Thankfully the screens are absent from the Fastpass line.

But on this day we were only subjected to the game two or three times out of all our standby rounds. We never waited longer than 35 minutes in standby, and of course Fastpass went much faster. What had started out as a few rides on Soarin' turned into a vendetta to beat our previous record of eight rides. Once we had reached that, with the line still reasonable and Fastpasses still in good supply, the object became cramming in as many rides as we could.

The other lines were minimal too. We didn't wait at all for Spaceship Earth and maybe only five minutes for Nemo. We did the single riders line at Test Track, which is usually short to non-existent anyway except for the busiest times. We had to wait 10 minutes for Turtle Talk, but that was because we got there just after a show had begun. I love Turtle Talk because you actually get to talk to Crush, and he answers and makes comments about the audience. It's a wonderful blend of on-the-fly animation and improv.

The kids sit on the floor in front, and Crush calls on them to ask him questions. Last time we were at Epcot, it was apparently field trip day from the School for Kids With Paralyzed Vocal Cords because every time a child was chosen, they immediately froze up. Mind you, they are supposed to raise their "flipper" if they have a question, but apparently they were mini sheeple in training...one kid would raise theirs and the rest would spontaneously follow for no good reason.

On that day, we went to another show figuring it would have to be better...surely we'd just hit on a dud. But no, it was the same story the next time. I'd never seen it fall so flat. Poor Crush does the best he can, but he had to have something to work with. By the third or fourth kid going, "Uh.....uh...." it gets old to say, "Having a Dory moment?"

Fortunately this time both Crush and the kids were in good form. My favorite line came when a kid mentioned Nemo. Crush said, "Yeah, he got lost one time. It took an hour and 33 minutes to find him!"

Before we knew it, it was dinnertime. The Soarin' line had finally shot up to an hour, and although we hoped it might drop we weren't holding our breath. I think everyone who wasn't staying for Illuminations was grabbing a last hang glider trip. We hoped to get one more Fastpass, although we knew that was rather greedy. Since we wouldn't be able to get one till 6:40, we decided to see if Garden Grill could take us as a walk-up.

I thought I was probably crazy to hope, since GG is a character meal and I think the free dining promotion is going on. Lo and behold, they were able to take us! I think we should have bought a lottery ticket on the way home because it was definitely our lucky day. Actually, I think we lucked out because we were a party of two, and GG mostly gets bigger family groups. We were seated in the two chairs on the end of what appeared to be a long booth to accommodate large parties...there was a big family at one end and us at the other.

Even though we were just two adults, the characters spent plenty of good interaction time with us. I was wearing my monorail hat, and Pluto thought it was a riot. He stole it and donned it himself! We didn't have a camera so hubby snapped a quick photo with his cell phone. Here it is...it's not too good, but it was one of those times when we just had to make do:



Sadly, by the time we were eligible for another Fastpass they had all run out. The line was an hour, and it was already 7:30, so we reluctantly decided to call it a night. I would have liked to reach 15, especially since it's almost the end of the dead season but oh well...lucky 13 sure isn't bad. Maybe it's even a good thing because that will give me something to aim for when dead season rolls around again next year.

Wonderful Time, The Sequel

Given the lack of lines at Animal Kingdom on Saturday, I had a nagging feeling that I might be missing out on some quality Soarin' time. For a ride that is essentially nothing more than an Imax/motion simulator with piped in scents, it's amazing that Soarin's wait times soar to two hours or more in the peak season. At those times, the Fastpasses disappear by 11 a.m. Thus I pretty much have to get my rides in large doses in the off-season, sort of like a squirrel gathering a supply of nuts for the winter. I fill my "Soarin' tank" when waits are minimal so I won't go through withdrawal from June through August.

Hubby had to work on Sunday, but when he was done we headed to Chevy's for a late lunch, followed by an evening at Epcot. We didn't get there till after 3 p.m., but we figured we might be lucky enough to cram in lots of quality ride time before the park closed at 9.

We could see that the crowd was fairly light as soon as we entered the gates. We hustled over to the Tip Board to get a handle on the current ride times. Soarin' was posted at 15 minutes! No way! I truly wanted to believe, but I noticed that everything else was walk-on except for Test Track, which was posted at 40. I suspected that the two had somehow been mixed up, since 40 mins. in the dead season isn't the norm for the giant slot car ride.

Still, we had to see for ourselves so we headed off for the Land Pavillion. There were still plenty of Fastpasses left for Soarin', so we grabbed one and checked out the standby line, which was posted at 25 minutes. Okay, a little more realistic, but I still thought it was a trick when I saw how far back the line density extended. Still, ever the optimists, hubby and I joined it. We waited...and waited...and waited...sure enough, it was a good 45 minutes before we boarded. Oh well, by the time we got off, it was time to get another Fastpass.

Since all the other rides were walk-on, we spent the evening bopping between Soarin' to use our Fastpases and get new ones and other rides to kill time between the Fastpasses. By 9 p.m. we had ridden Soarin' a whopping eight times, plus three spins on Test Track, one on the Land boat ride, one on Nemo, and two showings of Turtle Talk With Crush.

Normally Turtle Talk is one of my favorite Disney attractions. You literally talk to Crush, and he answers in context and also calls directly on various audience members. The kids all sit in the front of the theater and ask him questions...or in theory, that's what's supposed to happen. Unfortunately, at that showing all of the children must have been bussed in from the Cat's Got Your Tongue Group Home, as every one of them froze when Crush called on them. Mind you, there were told to raise their hands if they had a question, but each child froze like a deer in headlights when the Cast Member brought his microphone over.

Crush is quite the master of improv, but the poor turtle can't show his wit when he has no lines to work with. "Are you having a Dory moment?" only works the first time, but this entire group of kidlets was non-verbal in the Great Green One's presence.

Since there was no line, we decided to see it again. Surely the next group would give Crush something to work with. Nope! Once again, all the tots were dumbstruck. I've seen that happen before occasionally, but usually at least a couple of them will actually stutter out a question. Oh well, it must have been something in the air so we gave up and headed off to the Nemo ride.

I was amazed at how quickly the time rushed by as we carried out our marathon. Surprisingly the Soarin' standby line stayed at 40 to 45 minutes up until the very end, when the park was about to close. By then we had used up our Fastpasses, so we were very grateful for the drop as we hopped in for the last ride of the day.

By the time we were done, most of the Illuminations crowd had already disappeared out the gates. I couldn't believe that it had been less than six hours and we'd gotten eight rides on my favorite, plus a generous helping of other rides and shows as well. I know this won't last too much longer...the later September gets, the more the crowds grow. But heck, I'm sure gonna enjoy it while it lasts.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

In the carols, the most wonderful time of the year is Christmas but all good Disney fanatics know that it's actually early September. Right after Labor Day it's the best time to visit the theme parks because the lines will be virtually non-existent.

Several factors go into creating this welcome lull from the crowds. First, Mom and Dad don't want to pull Junior out of school so soon after the start. He's just getting settled in; he can always get yanked for a visit to the Mouse a few months down the road. Second, the Brazilian tour groups have all but disappeared since their holiday time is over. Third, this is prime time for a hurricane and tropical disturbances in the news tend to scare off some of the tourists.

Today hubby and I enjoyed this wonderful time of year with a jaunt to the Animal Kingdom. Hubby was lobbying to go to Universal, but I couldn't see the point. With our Premier Passes, we get to use the Express Lines no matter what time of year it is. Who wants to use 'em when the standby line is only 5 minutes anyway? At Disney, we're relegated to the regular Fastpass system with the rest of the hoi polloi, so we have to make the best of those few precious weeks when Fastpasses aren't even needed.

We made dinner reservations at Jiko and headed off to AK a couple of hours before closing. We figured we could to the safari, Dinosaur, and maybe one or two on Expedition Everest before park closing. Little did we know that we were vastly underestimating what we would be able to accomplish.

On the way into the park, I stopped at the little coffee kiosk to get a frozen mocha. I had skipped breakfast and lunch in anticipatipon of our Jiko meal, so I knew I had to get some concentrated sugar into my bloodstream. Otherwise I'd end up with a whanging headache from the backwards part of Expedition Everest. Usually I'm immune to any ill effects from roller coasters, but going in reverse in the dark seems to give me vertigo if I'm not all sugared up.

I felt a bit like an ad for Disney; the sight of my yummy, whipped cream-crested drink attracted another family to the stand, and as I was walking away, yet another person asked me where I had bought it. They should hire someone to stand in front of the kiosk brandished a cold and yummy looking beverage...I'll bet sales would triple.

We trooped into the park to decide on our ride strategy. Last time we did the safari right before closing and saw almost no animals. I'm sure they were off by the doors or gates of their enclosures, clamoring to escape the tourists and to go in for the night. Thus hubby suggested that we right the safari first, and it turned out to be an excellent idea.

There was no line, so we were on within minutes. I was utterly amazed, as we saw every animal from the hippos and elephants to the rhinos and warthog to the lion and even the elusive cheetah. There were crocs and cattle, giraffes and gazelles, and even an ostrich that appeared to want to climb into the truck with us.

Next up we headed to Dinoland, where I had to waste a few bucks on one of the games before riding Dinosaur. Of course I lost and hubby cleaned up, so I was stuck carrying around a couple of stuffed toys for the rest of the day. We did Tricerotops spin before heading to Dinosaur, and both of those were walk on just like the safari.

We hustled off the Asia, where Expedition Everest was also amazingly line-free. We did a couple of regular rides, then realized that the wait for the front seat was minimal. We ended up riding in the front repetitively until the park finally closed. I still couldn't believe the absence of people as memories of the July peak season were still firmly entrenched in my mind. I made a mental note to get to Epcot soon so I could rack up some quality Soarin' time.

As we joined the herd of sheeple and headed out of the park, I reminded myself that this was one of the reasons we moved to Florida. Every year we would come down for a week in December, but then we had to reluctantly return home. Now, we can come every day of the off-season that we want to, slacking off only when the crowds start to rise again. In the meantime, we can take full advantage of the most wonderful time of the year.

Ads That Upset Me

As much as I love living in Celebration, there are times when I cringe at the prospect of being known as a Central Floridian. It isn't bad enough that the Casey/Caylee Anthony fiasco has put us in a negative and neverending national spotlight, making the rest of America just as sick of the whole mess as we are. Now we've got a group going by the name of "Metro Orlando Mommies" that's protesting Universal Studios' Halloween Horror Nights billboard ads.

First, how the hell can I take a group seriously when it has such an eye-roll-inducing name? It conjures up visions of bored, overprotective soccer mommies whizzing around in their SUVs and trying to figure out what to get offended about next.

Second, it's Halloween Horror Nights, people. Yes, horror, as in blood, guts and gore. The ads in question show this year's icon, Bloody Mary of urban legend fame, with freaky white eyes and dripping blood and of course a broken mirror. Not much worse than what you can find at any given moment if you have cable TV.

Supposedly this horrific imagine is terrorizing little Britt and Kyle and Dillon as they whiz down I-4. Come on, how many Soccer Mom Spawn to you know that even pay attention to billboards? They're all too busy keeping their precious little noses stuck in the SUV's built in entertainment system. After all, God forbid they be expected to amuse themselves for more than a minute or two without artificial help.

I'm glad I grew up in tougher times. My mother didn't believe in babysitters, so she dragged me to horror movies from toddlerhood on. I saw "Night of the Living Dead" at the age of three and virtually every other blood-and-gore movie you can imagine. Dracula, Blackula and Count Yorga...yep, saw every single version of a blood sucker that Hollywood ever put out. Infamous grade B romps like "The Corpse Grinders"...yep, saw those too. Eco-disasters like "Frogs?" Oh yeah, we were front and center for those. Nearly from the time I cleared the womb entrance, I was exposed to every kind of cinematic gore possible.

Did this turn me into a cringing blob of jelly? Hello, no, I love Halloween and haunted houses. If someone's kiddo is terrified by a billboard, it's time for a little toughening. Of course, these are the same Mommies who insist that everyone get a trophy and that the whole class be put on the honor roll so that Buffy's delicate feelings won't be hurt. Then their kids grow up with absolutely no coping skills, and they bob their bubbly heads and try to figure out what went wrong...duh!

I'm shocked that the newspaper and TV stations are even giving this ridiculous story any attention. I suppose there are two reasons: one, the hurricane is a spectacular un-event; and two, it gives them something else to focus on other than Caylee ad naseum.

If they really want to focus on a scary and disturbing ad, I suggest that they turn to the latest offering from Charmin toilet paper. I stopped using Charmin several years ago, when they decided to illustrate the principle of "does a bear shit in the woods?" with frolicking, butt-wiping cartoon bears relieving their bowels and wiping their butts in disturbing family-gathering situations. I'll take Bloody Mary over happy, poop-wiping bruins dancing as they polish their posteriors any day.

Now Charmin has really crossed the line. Their cartoon bears have developed dingleberries! I kid you not...they now have a bear running amock with a crop of nasty white klingons while Mother Bear (probably a member of the Central Forest Mommies) chases him with a dustpan and broom. Ugh! That's just so wrong.

Are dingleberries really such a issue that we have to be subjected to such a graphic demonstration? Should watching a sticky-butted bear really make me want to turn to Charmin to protect me from the problem?

Bloody Mary may be scary to Orlando's overprotected junior set and their air-headed, offense-seeking Mommies, but I'll take her any day over Charmin's "Attack of the Klingons." Yes, bears do shit in the woods, but some things are meant to be done in privacy rather than be splashed all over my TV screen.

You Know You're Back in Orlando When...

...the Fox Orlando television programming is continually interrupted with non-news about Caylee and Casey Anthony. My blog has been idle for a while as I was on a 15-day Disney Cruise through the Panama Canal. Even in Mexico and Columbia I was subjected to pointless blathering about the Anthony case on CNN, but at least they didn't continually interrupt programming.

We arrived home on Monday, but I didn't feel like I was really home until today, when my court shows were interrupted for the world's most boring press conference. Seriously, if they gave out Emmy awards for Most Dull and Pointless Press Conference and Worst Public Speaker, today's travesty would win hands down. Some dude from the search group that has been fruitlessly combing the area for poor little Caylee's body is currently reveling Fox Orlando viewers with such exciting phrases as, "An airplane is going over. Let's wait until it goes over. I wish I were on that plane," and "If we have more people, we can cover more ground." Oooo, really? Wow, that's so insightful!

On the lefthand side of the screen, Fox is running a loop of Caylee photos and video that I've seen so often that I'm surprised I don't have nightmares about them. Unfortunately, the press conference itself is so dull that the seen-'em-a-million-times photos are actually scintillating by comparison.

Even though it's been three days since I stepped off the Disney Magic, I didn't really feel like I was back in the real world yet. With the resumption of the who-the-hell-cares Caylee coverage, I know for sure that I am home.

Citricos Floor Show

Disney World is known for its dinner shows, primarily the Hoop Dee Doo Review and the luau at the Polynesian, although Mickey's Backyard Barbecue has its charm too. I thought we were familiar with all of them, but the other night I discovered a show at a restaurant where I would never have expected it: Citricos at the Grand Floridian. From what I could tell it was mostly a comedy, somewhat interactive, and we ended up with a front row seat.

First, a little background on Citricos and the hotel. It's one of the signature restaurants, and for good reason. The food is absolutely to die for, and the ambiance is generally lovely. The whole Grand Floridian hotel looks like something out of Mary Poppins, and Mary herself appears there at a character meal. There's an elegant staircase where countless wedding photos have been snapped and a live band to serenade strollers. My favorite time to visit is around Christmas, when chestnuts are literally roasting and a huge gingerbread house imparts a tasty cookie smell to the entire lobby.

We usually eat at Citricos early in the day, around the time they first open (5:30ish). It's still light out, and we generally get seated in the back dining room which has a pool view. That in itself can be a bit of a show; we once saw Cinderella's carriage, drawn by white ponies, go by on its way to a wedding. But for the most part it's quiet and low key, especially for a Disney restaurant where fussy, wailing kids are often the norm even at the fanciest and priciest places.

It's hard to describe the food, but if pressed I would say that it's fru fru Italian fusion. That doesn't really do it justice; there's a wide variety and it often changes weekly depending on what fresh ingredients are available. I'm a huge fan of their appetizers, especially the goat cheese truffles and what I call risotto mc nuggets, a name that doesn't do them justice (but I can't think of the real name right now). Basically they are deep fried balls of risotto, and they are so good! They also had an heirloom tomato and buffalo mozzarella salad imported straight from Heaven, but sadly it's off the menu at the moment.

The entrees are no slouch either. The rotisserie pork is my favorite, although hubby loves the short rib. The various fish dishes are tasty, too, if you're into seafood. For dessert, there are homemade gelatos that rival the godly concoctions I get in Palo on the Disney cruise ships, and the chocolate banana tort is amazing.

All in all, Citricos is among my top three favorite Disney restaurants, with Jiko and Artist Point holding the other two slots. Its only drawback is that the Grand Floridian's parking lot is located across the street vs. right by the hotel like Wilderness Lodge and Animal Kingdom Lodge. Actually, I suppose that the extra walk is a plus, since it burns off a couple of the calories packed in those scoops of gelato. In the worst case, if I want to be supremely lazy, valet parking is included free with the Disney Dining Experience card, but I usually don't resort to that unless it's a stormy day.

The Floridian is generally viewed as a hoity toity hotel, and Citricos has a matching classy ambiance. Nothing at Disney is too formal, since lots of people roll in fresh from the theme parks sweaty, ruffled and jeans clad. But Citricos is still upscale, so I never expected to have a show like we had the other night. On this occasion, we got there much later than usual because my husband had flown in from Chicago and his plane was delayed. I suspected there would be a delay when I made the reservation, so I'd managed to time it pretty close to his actual arrival. At opening time the restaurant is practically a ghost town, but at this later hour it was jam packed with diners. Instead of being seated in the back dining room, we ended up at a table in the one closer to the front.

We settled in for our meal and had just finished our appetizers when the entertainment arrived. It was a group of several adults and a troop of eight kids, none over the age of 12. They were brought to a table across from us, where the adults began arguing animatedly with the hostess. The argument went on for quite some time, and at first I couldn't decipher it. Soon I realized that the parents were demanding a table far, far away from their little darlings. Yes indeed, they were seating the kids in our dining room and demanding that the adults be seated in the back one! We saw this happen at Denny's once, when the parents insisted on sitting across the dining room from their rampaging kidlets, but it seemed a bit out of place at Citricos. It was quite a sight to see one of the adult men fuming with his hands crossed over his chest, his face pulled down in a pout as he waited to see if a table could be found. I half expected him to melt down into a tantrum and beat his fists on the floor.

One of the kids appeared to be almost comatose. I felt rather sorry for him, as he was slumping over the table with his head down, nearly asleep. It was probably around 9:30, so he was no doubt exhausted from a day of theme parking. The pouty man descended on him like an avenging angel, pulled him up, boxed his ears, and marched him out of the restaurant, apparently all for the crime of nearly nodding off. A few minutes later they returned and the man shoved him back in his seat. At that point a table at the other end of the restaurant had been found for the adults so they marked away from their spawn as quickly as possible.

With the first act over, hubby and I turned to our entrees which had just arrived. Shortly thereafter I noticed that the kids' table received some food, and they fell to devouring it like hungry, crazed wolves. For a moment I almost wondered if the parents were only going to let them have bread. It reminded me of a fateful visit to the Weber Grill back in Illinois. Like Citricos, Weber Grill is rather upscale and has wonderful food (virtually all of which is cooked in some manner on the namesake grills). One day we were eating there when a family with a huge gaggle of kids trooped in. They were seated and said they didn't want to order till their friends arrived, but they asked for bread. When the bread basket arrived, the kids fell to like they hadn't seen food in a week. They went through three bread baskets, and their supposed friends never materialized. All of a sudden they got up and trooped out, never to be seen again, although one of the adults did toss a dollar on the crust and crumb strewn table.

But the Citricos gaggle did receive actual food, and once they had consumed it they launched right into Act Two. Now re-energized by their repast, they took to literally chasing each other around the dining room, while one child entertained us by doing gymnastics using two chairs as parallel bars. With no parental figure in sight, they were obviously taking full advantage of their freedom. I could see why the adults had insisted on eating in a separate dining room; they were no doubt tucking into a relaxing meal while strangers were dealing with the antics of their spawn.

At one point the young uns regrouped at the table and began spiritedly throwing some food remnants at each other in a manner that would have made John Belushi proud. I noticed that a couple at a nearby table had called a manager over and were in the midst of a spirited complaint. I'm not sure if it was related to the Von Trapp Family From Hell, but that's where I'd lay my money since they were closer to the kids' table than we were.

By the time we were ready to go, I don't even think the kids were using the table as a home base anymore. They had pretty much dispersed around the restaurant and appeared to be playing some form of tag, except for one toddler who was sprawled out on the floor and rolling around like log. We shook our heads as we headed out, amazed that we had learned something new. I never would have pegged Citricos as having a floor show, but on this night they most certainly did and we'd been front and center to see it.

Oh well, I guess that after the antics of the wild kid troop anything else will be tame. Our previous award winner for Most Interesting Disney Dining Experience happened recently at Jiko. We were seated across from a family that was rather unremarkable for most of the meal. At dessert time they all abandoned the table, leaving one member behind...a grandmotherly looking type who proceeded to whip out a cell phone and weld it to her ear. Okay, not the best of manners but rapidly becoming a norm so it still wasn't all that remarkable...until the bodily function conversation began.

In a loud Boston accent, she proceeded to yelp into the phone about a friend of hers whose medication was making him "puke his guts and pee like a racehorse." Those were her exact words, repeated several times for emphasis at a decibel level that invited everyone around her to share in the visualization of her graphic description. Thankfully we were already on dessert or I would have asked the manager to have a discreet word with her. She yammered on about the peeing for another 10 minutes, then loudly began boasting about her disability card. "I just give it to the rest of the family and relax in the room while they use it," she bellowed. "It's great because they don't have to wait in the long lines and I don't even have to be there with them. I just love spoiling them when we're at Disney World!" I'm not sure what her disability was, but my money was on Chronic Diarrhea of the Mouth. As we walked out, she was babbling on inanely about her dog sitter.

Most of our meals at Disney are rather mundane, with only the occasional screaming baby or kid using a buffet serving spoon to sample the wares. But every now and then you get the Ditch the Kids Family or Horse Pee Lady, and that's the stuff that memories are made of.

Potty Time at Disney World

I was perusing a Disney forum that I frequent, and someone posted a question about the cleanliness of the theme park restrooms. In days gone by, the Mouse had a reputation for being squeaky clean. In those days, you could always count on pristine potties. But nowadays, I'm sorry to say that gross restrooms are the norm. It's not Disney's fault so much as that of uncaring guests, but they're usually pretty filthy lately regardless of the reason.

Interestingly enough, there were a spate of responses praising the spotlessness of Disney johns. Of course, these were from occasional visitors who come maybe once a year and whose last visit might have been years ago. As someone who visits the parks once or twice a week and who downs copious amounts of water to stay hydrated in the Florida sun, I know very well how dirty the restrooms have become.

It's become a bit of a running joke between hubby and I as to how many stalls I have to peek into before a find one clean enough to rest my fussy butt. Many are the recipients of a golden shower, speckled with pee from a careless squatter who was too lazy to wipe off their mess. Those are nasty enough, but the worst are the stalls where you encounter a couple of chocolate logs floating on a nest of tissue. Nothing makes me back out quicker than that nasty present left by the last occupant.

For those latter disgusting circumstances, I blame the automatic flushers. People have become conditioned not to notice whether the flusher actually worked, or perhaps they just don't care. Problem is, lots of parents have kids who hate those things, so they put a sticker over the sensor to spare the trauma for Juniorette. Of course, they don't bother to remove it, and now you've got a sullied stall.

You've also got the guests who think that just because one Disney restroom has automatic flushers, that means that all of them do. Sadly, they don't and the ones with old-fashioned manual handles tends to contain some of the worst toilet bowl surprises. You've got the self centered sorts, too, like the woman who told her companion as she exited a stall with her leavings prominently floating, "I never touch toilet handles."

Disney tried to keep up with mess; almost every time I'm in a restroom, I see a poor, long-suffering Cast Member trying to clean up the chaos. Problem is, as soon as they scrub out one stall, there's someone slipping inside to sully it again.

Fortuntely, my regular visits to the park have endowed me with a near encyclopedic knowledge of the location of every restroom and the usual condition of each. Those on the main drag or near popular rides tend to be among the worst. There are a few that are tucked away in "hidden" areas, and those are usually tolerable. On average, I end up having to check three stalls before finding one without a pee spray or filled bowl. My world's record is a whopping seven stalls; it happened one peak season evening at Epcot, and I was almost ready to despair before I finally found an acceptable potty place.

This neverending quest for the Perfect Potty has even invaded my subconscious. When I'm sleeping but need to wake up to go to the restroom, I'll dream that I'm in a public potty searching futilely for a stall. Unfortunately every one of them is useless. In Dreamland it's not just because of filth. Some might not have a door on the stall, while others are missing the seat. Regardless, I search in vain till I finally slog back from sleep to consciousness and drag my carcass to the bathroom. I live in fear of what might happen if I actually find a useable potty before I wake up!

If I Have to Suffer, So Do My Readers

Once again, Fox Orlando has broken into programming twice. Their big news story? Crime scene investigators have visited the Anthony home yet again. I'm not sure what is newsworthy about that, but I have to keep reminding myself that it's not about the newsworthiness...it's about the news department's desperate need for airtime. Really, I think it would be more newsworthy if crime scene investigators weren't at the Anthonys' house.

This seems to be a strictly Florida obsession for the Fox network. I watched a lot of Fox in Chicago, and I can't remember any break-ins except for perhaps the occasional tornado warning. Living in an area on the fringes of Tornado Alley, I was able to agree that a giant, swirling funnel cloud bearing down on my 'burb was a worthy reason to interrupt my court shows. But even that was somewhat needless, as we had tornado sirens that wailed a warning whenever meteorlogical danger lurked in the skies.

The absence of tornado sirens was one of the strangest things I noticed when we first moved to Florida. Even though hurricanes are our major foe, those provide lots of warning so sirens would be pointless for those. But our vicious summer thunderstorms are perfect tornado spawners, so it seems like the sirens would still be of use.

Nope. None. Nada. If you want a warning, you have to get a weather radio. I'd like to think that Fox would break in to warn me, too, but if a tornado was bearing down on Celebration at the same time that a member of the Anthony family burped, I know they'd cover the burp instead even as we all got whisked off to Oz.

I supposed it doesn't matter much anyway, since virtually no one in Central Florida actually has a basement. If a tornado bears down on our happy little down, the most that you can do is kneel down on the floor and kiss your butt goodbye. Supposedly a bathroom is the safest room, but two of our bathrooms at Duloc Manor are upstairs and liberally dotted with windows. The downstairs powder room is located, Harry Potter-like, under the stairwell, which is probably a good spot. Only problem is, I don't know how well two humans, three cats and a bird would actually fit inside. Maybe we'd be better off not knowing as Death in the Sky bears down.

Interestingly enough, the commonality of thunderstorms in Florida has the definition of "severe" for both hubby and I. Since he still goes back to Chicago semi-regularly, he can still compare the storms there vs. what we have in Florida. Recently his co-workers were lamenting on the ferocity of a storm, and he shrugged and rolled his eyes...compared to our tropical blasts, with their walls of rail and serial lightning strikes, a Windy City storm feels like God is barely spitting down from the heavens.

When we first moved to Celebration, I remember the sheer panic of being caught in one of those blinding water walls while driving. I'd inch along in the "tourist lane," terrified that I was going to rear end an invisible car, while the locals all whizzed by at insane speeds, nearly oblivious to the nasty conditions. Now, while I'm not as brave as a true native or long-time resident, I no longer go into a panic attack and say non-stop prayers as I precariously guide Kitt through the monsoon. Instead I proceed with resignation, knowing that it's a fact of Floridian life and much better than driving in a blizzard.

As I end this blog post, there has been yet another break-in on the television to remind me that the crime scene people are still at the Anthonys' house. Somehow, knowing that makes me feel so much better...I would be very upset if they had left and I had to wait all of 45 minutes for the 5 o'clock news to find that out.

The Desperation Continues

Fox Orlando has once again broken into the court shows with the following stunning news that Central Florida surely could not have waited for:

1) Casey Anthony (mother of the missing child in the ongoing case mentioned in my other blog post) was not visited by her mom! Wow! Her mother opted to not visit her in jail today! I am so glad that they interrupted "Judge Mathis" to tell me because I wasn't able to pay attention to the show anyway. My mind kept whispering, "Well, Casey's mother visits her a lot, but what if she decided not to today? That would be such a major development, and I wouldn't know about it!"

2) Casey has had some formal charges filed against her. No new evidence and no actual murder charges, just a dull assortment of obstructing-type things. Ho hum.

It makes me wonder, is the Fox news team really so deluded that they think anyone actually gives a flying flip about that crap? Or are they so hungry for air time that it's crossed over into some scary sort of mental disorder that will cause them to grasp at even more desperate straws when this case is finally over? Does it feed their ego deficits to feel that they are more powerful than poor Judge Mathis and able to knock him off the air at their whim?

Even as a mental health professional, I have a hard time making sense of it. We're back to the court shows now, and I'm a little uneasy because I'm afraid that Casey might pick her nose or bite her fingernail and I won't know about it. Silly me, I'm watching Fox Orlando...they would never deprive me of news of that magnitude!

A Recurring Dream

The Year of a Millions Dreams at Disney World became a recurring dream for hubby and I today. Last month we won Dream Fastpasses at Disney Hollywood Studio in the One Man's Dream exhibit, and in June on a solo visit I won a Dream Fastpass at Soarin'. Today we went over to Animal Kingdom, planning to do a safari and grab a few Single Rider runs on Expedition Everest. If the crowds were thin enough, we figured we'd do Dinosaur too. Then lunch at Yak and Yeti and we'd be out by a little after noon. Little did we know that we were about to have a recurring dream.

We arrived shortly after rope drop (I like to let the crowd disperse a bit) and headed to the safari ride to get a Fastpass. Then we figured we'd kill time on Primeval Whirl, since it rarely has a line in the morning, till it was time for another Fastpass. We'd get one for Dinosaur, then trek over to Everest. After some roller coastering, we'd do the safari with our first FP, have lunch, do Dinosaur with the second one, and then bail.

Primeval Whirl is the world's wickedest wild mouse coaster/tilt-a-whirl combination. Just as we'd suspected, there was no wait. I approached it somewhat apprehensively, since massive spinning sometimes gives me a whanging headache. I didn't have any after effects last time I rode it, so I was hoping that my resistance was building.

Each ride is different, depending on the weight distribution in the car. On our ride, the spinning was so mild that I agreed to do it again. The next time around, it was the Spinning Ride From Hell! Somehow we were perfectly space so that it whipped wildly in a circular frenzy. Even when it finally stopped, my head still felt like it was spinning. Fortunately it wore off quickly, with no headache after effects. That ride looks deceptively simple, but it has a wicked bite.

Since it was time to get another Fastpass, we started on our way to Dinosaur. As we passed Triceratops Whirl (basically the Dumbo ride with dinosaurs instead of elephants), hubby noticed there was literally no wait. We'd never ridden it before, so he suggested, "Let's do it" and I figured "What the heck?" That turned out to be a very good move!

We had our ride, then continued on our way. We noticed that Dinosaur actually had a very short standby line, so we decided to just ride it then and there. We joined the line, and as we threaded our way to the pre-show room, my keen eyes spotted a member of the Dream Team standing near the door. He was wearing a white vest over his blue shirt, which means one very important thing: Prize mode! I nudged hubby, but with his pessimistic nature he figured that the pre-show group before us were probably the lucky ones.

The Dream Team member smiled as we all filed into the room. Amazingly, I was the only person who realized what was up. Even with constant commercials and banners throughout the park, all of our fellow guests appeared totally oblivious that luck was upon them. As the room darkened for the video, I noticed two Dream Team Cast Members slip over to the exit doors so they could hand out whatever prize we were winning as people walked out to the ride.

When the video ended and the lights came on, two people nearly bowled the poor Dream Team over in a frenzy to rush to the loading area! Obviously they had no clue and didn't mind tackling anyone who got between them and the ride. The Cast Members managed to contain them and asked, "Does everyone here know what the Year of a Million Dreams is?" Mostly they were met with blank stares, but I applauded and a few people joined in, figuring it must be something good. Then they announced that we had all won Dream Fastpasses. I applauded again, but I could tell that most of my fellow guests were still in a state of confusion. Oh well, hubby and I sure knew what was happening! Our spontaneous decision to ride Triceratops Whirl had put us in the right place at just the right time.

We took our Fastpasses and high-fived the Dream Team as we headed out to the ride. Our quick morning trip to Animal Kingdom had suddenly changed course. Now we would get an extra ride on Everest, Dinosaur, and the safari, and we'd even do a repeat on Primeval Whirl since we could do it with no wait.

We had quite a busy day, with an overall total of two rides on Dinosaur, two on the safari, three on Primeval Whirl, one on Triceratops Spin, and four on Expedition Everest, as well as a leisurely lunch at Yak and Yeti. All that in a little over five hours, as we'd arrived at a little after 9 and were out of the park by 2:30. Best of all, I saw the cheetahs both times on the safari ride...they are my favorite animals, but they're elusive little cusses.

As we headed out to the car, we stopped at the coffee stand just outside the park for iced lattes. That's a tradition for me, and the icy cold beverages tasted so refreshing in the oppressive Florida sun. They were a perfect capper to a busy day.

Ironically, although I usually ride Dinosaur when I visit Animal Kingdom, I have a bit of a vendetta against that ride. It uses the same ride vehicles as the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland, but that's where the similarities end. Dinosaur is a pale imitation of the awesome ride that is Indy. Thus I always remind myself that Florida got stuck with the red-haired stepchild version whenever I ride it.

Now that it was the scene of a lucky lightning strike, I suspect I'll be a little more kindly disposed towards it. No, it's not Indy, but whenever I'm in the preshow I'll have the happy memory of seeing the white-vested Dream Team and getting that Dream Fastpass placed in my grubby little hand.

Awww...No Hurricanes!

Apparently my good friends at Fox Orlando are bored out of their minds with the fact that there has been little to no hurricane activity this year. As I have chronicled previously, they love to break into the afternoon court shows with various non-events. One of their favorite is the weather, since Floridians are quite sensitive to the thought of another killer hurricane brewing ala the Charley/Francis/Jean trio. Thus the bored news and weather forecasters can justify air time, even when the supposed "hurricane" is a breeze caused by a whale fart somewhere out in the Atlantic.

Alas, this season there hasn't even been any sea mammal flatulance to seize up. But recently we've had a newcaster's wet dream in the form of a tragic child disappearance case. Little Cayley Anthony disappeared over a month ago, although her mother and grandmother only got around to reporting it 31 days after she supposedly went missing. The mom is in prison, and the grandparents steadfastly maintain her innocence despite having previously reported a smell of decomposition in their car (which the mom had taken) and other evidence that seems to point to not-so-clean hands on Mommy's part. A cadaver dog hit on the car smell as well as keying in on areas in their yard. There have been searches, digging, and a general media bruhaha but nothing in the way of concrete answers.

Fox has been desperately clinging to any tiny straw as an excuse for a break-in. Cayley's mom made a phone call. NEWS FLASH! BREAK INTO PROGRAMMING! Cayley's mom ate a cantelope for breakfast. BREAK IN IMMEDIATELY! She blew her nose...BREAKING NEWS FOR SURE!

Today was one of the most pathetic examples. Investigators were questioning the grandparents for perhaps the twentieth time and searching their home once again. Yawn. But that was good for a flurry of programming interruptions and face time for the newscaster. Then the sheriff called a news conference to say "Nothing new." In an orgasm of non-news acitivity, Fox televised the boredom while playing a loop of the same old footage from earlier in the day over and over, punctuated with photos of the poor child. Between us, hubby and I counted nine repetitions of the loop of cops carrying bags out of the house. Wow. Scintillating. Once surely wasn't enough.

I feel terrible for that poor little child, and I fear that odds are slim of her turning up alive. But at this point I really don't want to hear another word unless the sheriff is wielding her body at the news conference. Sadly, I suspect that the non-news reporting will continue with unabated enthusiasm unless a hurricane finally whips up.

Can't wait to find out how many times Cayley's mom blinked in prison today and if she burped after her meal.

Bye Bye Bennigans...Not

Yesterday my husband informed me that Bennigan's was no more. According to his gloom and doom announcement, the Irish pub and grill chain had announced its bankruptcy and ceased to exist. That made me a bit sad, as Bennigan's features in many of our little family memories. Perhaps the fondest goes back to a time before we were married. When we first started dating, I had no intention of ever tying the knot, and I had announced as much to my eventual husband to be. I told him I was only in it for the good times, and he just smirked knowingly (and it still annoys me that he turned out to be right, but who can turn down a man who cooks, does laundry, vaccums, and cleans cat vomit?).

In those early years of our courtship, there was a Bennigan's near his home. Given its convenient location (and my addiction to their Mason jar ice cream dessert), it was the site of many dates. At the time, the park district had an indoor wave pool so we'd often go for a round of inner tube wave riding and then follow up with a Bennigan's dinner.

One day it was snowing, so he dropped me off at the front door while he parked the car. Because we were both fresh from the pool, our hair was dripping wet. There was no wait for a table, so the hostess seated me and I figured that he wouldn't have much trouble finding me. A few minutes later he showed up at the table snickering. "What?" I demanded, and he told me, "The hostess said your wife is over there." I guess the matching sodden coiffures that we both sported pegged us as a pair, and for some reason she assumed we'd been through nuptuals. Of course, it annoyed me to no end since I fiercely defended my single status...little did I know what the future held. Hubby still smugly reminds me of that day.

Ironically, Bennigan's played a big role in our eventual wedding. Being an unconventional couple, a plain old church wouldn't do for our ceremony. Instead, on Valentine's Day we headed to the top of the John Hancock Building and exchanged our vows with the Chicago skyline as our backdrop. Afterwards, where did our intrepid wedding party head for a meal? Bennigan's! I supposed it was fitting in a way.

Another Bennigan's milestone occurred a few years back, the day after our elderly cat Muse had died. At that point, we were down to only Tooncinator the crazy cat, which was pretty much like not having a pet at all. It was more like harboring a demonic creature that stayed in hiding most of the time, popping out only occasionally to savage you unexpectedly.

Even though I was still in mourning, I knew it would be good to get another cat. Even if we didn't decide on one at that day, we could fill out the paperwork at the shelter. They'd keep it on file for a month so we could always come back later to find a suitable pet.

Nothing particularly caught my eye, but hubby homed in on a scrawny black and white cat with an unhealthy yellow tinge to his fur and a sign on his cage that said "Not for adoption." Turns out that was because he was being treated for worms; they said they'd let us have him if we'd agree to continue the treatment. I wasn't too enthusiastic; I love tuxedo cats, but they have to have a white streak down their nose. This one's head was entirely black. But for some reason he bonded with hubby, so it looked like he'd earned himself a new home...almost.

We decided not to make any rash choices, so we went to lunch to discuss the potential new family member. Since Bennigan's was just down the road, that's where we ended up. We discussed the cat's fate as we noshed, and lucky for him he won out in the end. Now he's here at Duloc Manor, dubbed Stitch due to his unadoptable status, chubby, no longer yellowed, and totally incorrigible.

Now, according to hubby, no more Bennigan's memories would be made. Already I was missing my favorite drink (the Bulldog) and their tasty boneless Guiness wings. There is a Bennigan's almost right across from Celebration and another one out on 535, so we tended to bop between those two. I searched online and discovered that although all corporate stores were closing, franchises supposedly were not. I had no clue as to who owned our local stores so I figured I'd call them the next day.

Turns out that the 192 and 535 locations are just about the only ones remaining in the area! Both are franchise owned so both are still open for business, at least for now. To celebrate, I went to Bennigan's for lunch and indulged in Guiness wings and baked potato soup. Since it was only noon, I held off on the Bulldog.

Sadly, the Bennigan's where we had our wedding meal is closed, and I think that the other two we used to visit in the Chicago suburbs also met the same fate. Oh well, the memories aren't over just yet since we've still got two to chose from here in Florida.

A Segway Kind of Day

The Segway was the "personal transporter" that was supposed to revolutionize the world and have entire cities designed around it. I don't know what drugs its inventors were taking to come up with that fantasy, but of course it never happened. Who wants to tool around on a two-wheeled device in the winter or in a rainy climate like Florida? If you're a city dweller in a place like Chicago or New York, do you really think anyone will get out of your way so you can crank your Segway up to its 12 mph top speed? Can you realistically carry a heck of a lot while riding one?

Just as I suspected when I first heard about it, it's been relegated to the status of a novelty item. That's not to say they're not run to ride. I rode the old style several times on Disney's cruise ships and their island, Castaway Cay, when they used to offer it. Hubby and I also tried to take the World Showcase tour at Epcot (also on the old style), but it rained out so we only got an abbreviated version.

Now Segways have been upgraded to a more intuitive, easier to turn model. Better yet, they have one with rough-terrain tires that is used on tours of Disney's Fort Wilderness. Hubby and I have been planned to go on that tour ever since it was announced last year, and we finally got around to it this morning. I think what whet our appetite and finally pushed us into doing it was doing the free "sample" ride in Innoventions at Epcot. It had been a while since we'd been on a Segway, and it left us wanting more.

There are two departures on the day it's offered, but we chose the early one (8:30 a.m.) hoping to beat any afternoon rain. That meant waking up at a bleary-eyed 7 a.m., parking at the front of the campground, and taking an internal bus back to the Mickey's Backyard Barbeque Pavillion, which also happens to be the meeting point.

We made good time and were the first arrivals. We signed releases, chose helmets and stashed out stuff into the carrying pack and our Segways. Our fellow tour guests trickled in; the tour can accommodate 10, and we happened to have eight on this fine (but humid) morning.

Below is the logo on the Segways and a picture of the Segways themselves:

Before you head off onto the roads and back trails of Fort Wilderness, you watch a safety video and go through some practice like veering around cones and heading up and down inclines. Our two guides, Ron and Robert, made sure that everyone felt comfortable before we headed out. They also passed out bottles of water, which were quite welcome once we got out into the heat. While much of the area you ride in is shaded, the July humidity will still sweat you into dehydration.

There were some photo stops along the way. Here are hubby and I, with Space Moutain and the Contemporary in the far background.

Below are our guides, Robert and Ron.

We also went through a camp loop and stopped at the Tri Circle D Ranch to see the horses and some equine memorabilia, as seen below:

The white ponies in the distance below pull Cinderella's Coach when they are not relaxing. We saw them at the Grand Floridian the other day, harnessed to the coach, for a wedding.

Here was another scenic point at the edge of Bay Lake:

Below is some of the forest overhang. While some of the roads were paved, we also took dirt trails between the marsh areas and did a bit of optional off-roading (I think everyone took that option!). The Segways are governed at 6 mph so you can't do anything too crazy, but those thick tires certainly handle tree roots, pine cones, dirt ruts, and sand without any problems.

We also visited the Wilderness Lodge, where it was quite amusing to see the surprised looks on guests' faces as we headed around the exterior areas of the hotel. In addition to riding and sightseeing, Ron and Robert hit us up with lots of Disney trivia questions. They had plenty of silly jokes, too, reminiscent of the Jungle Cruise. It was most definitely a Disney experience!

The tour is billed as lasting two hours, and it does indeed go the whole time. Of course, some time in the beginning is devoted to the training, but you're out on the trails by 9. There are restroom facilities at the start of the tour and also a stop near the facilities outside of Hoop De Doo, although no one needed to go at that point. Other than that, you won't hit anymore restrooms till the end of the tour, but no one seemed to be too desperate.

Both hubby and I had a blast. While you don't ride full tilt or do anything crazy, you do zip along at a good pace and have a couple of opportunities to off-road for brief periods. You see some lovely trails that most people who visit Fort Wilderness miss, and the guides will explain the various flora and fauna along the way.

No one in our group seemed to have much trouble mastering the Segways. One couple seemed a little unsteady early on, but by the time it was over they appeared to have built up their comfort level. Both hubby and I had no problems at all, since we've had previous experience. The only thing we had to get used to was turning bike-style vs. using the knob on one handle on the older models. The new Segways are a huge improvement, and the off-road tires feel very steady even on bumpy terrain.

At the end of the tour, we all received pins to commemorate our experience. I couldn't believe how quickly it had flown by! I want to do the whole World Showcase tour sans rain, but it will probably seem relatively tame compared to a Fort Wilderness jaunt.

We had made 11:30 reservations for lunch at Garden Grill in Epcot's Land Pavillion. We knew the park would be insanely busy, so we harbored no illusions about getting a Soarin' Fastpass for any decent return time. But amazingly, even tho' we arrived at a little after 11, we got a 1:15 return time! That is almost unheard of in July. Indeed, the standby line was "only" 50-60 minutes. That might sound like a lot until you compared it with the usual 120-180. I was quite surprised that Test Track's standy was longer (70 mins.).

The Garden Grill lunch is a character meal, and it's being discontinued soon. I wanted to do it one last time, since hubby and I used to do it fairly frequently when we lived in Chicago and came to WDW as tourists. It's a plated meal; you get catfish, chicken and beef, plus scalloped potatoes, green beans and rolls. You can eat as much as you want, and you also get a custard pastry with strawberries for dessert.

When we got there, the place was nearly deserted so we got some great character photos as you can see below:

After our meal, we killed time on the Living With The Land boat ride, in the single rider line of Test Track and browsing at the Epcot 25th Anniversary display. I especially enjoyed the Figment and Horizons memorabilia.

When we returned to the Land, we got new Fastpasses even tho' the return time was late and we knew we had to get home to work. I figured that we could just give them away. We had a lovely Soarin' ride, and on the way out we were discussing our Fastpasses. A man and his daughter overheard us; he had four FPs with an immediately return time and offered to swap two of his to us since he was staying late. What a lucky break! I wished I had some of my trader pins to give his daughter or something, but alas I was barehanded. Hopefully the good karma will come back around to him.

We grabbed our bonus Soarin' ride, then managed to slip in Spaceship Earth on the way out because the line had cut down to almost nil. We made it to the car just in the nick of time, as the afternoon showers started spitting on the windshield just as we pulled out of the parking lot.

All in all, it had been a great day, especially for July. We had an enjoyable Segway tour, a yummy lunch, and two bonus rides on Soarin' (we'd been expecting none), plus a few other rides just for the heck of it. I'm looking forward to doing the World Showcase tour in the near future, but it's going to have a hard time holding up.

One Man's Dream...Literally

I've been doing morning theme park visits, and today hubby decided to join me. Since we both work from home, we can juggle our schedules around some playtime as long as we make up for it later. I've been wanting to try Toy Story Mania, the new ride at Disney Hollywood Studio, so we figured we'd rush over first thing in the morning. We could grab a Fastpass and kill some time on Tower of Terror or The Great Movie Ride till our Fastpass time rolled around. In theory, Toy Story Mania has a Singles Ride so we might be able to get a bonus ride that way too. In practice, it opens and closes based on the phases of the moon, and it doesn't move too fast even when it's open, so we weren't counting on that.

We wanted to arrive a little bit after opening time so the major crowd would be cleared out a bit. Since we have a AAA parking pass, we knew we'd be able to get a good spot without having to arrive the moment the parking plaza opens. We made it shortly after nine, and as we approached the gates we could see it was going to be an ultra-busy day. The turnstyle lines were still backed up past the ticket booths. Oh well, we had our plans: get Toy Story Mania Fastpasses, kill time (preferably at Tower of Terror) till our FPs can be used, a lunch at Sci-Fi (we'd made ressies for 11 a.m.), and then bail.

We hustled to the Toy Story FP machines, which had lines almost as long as the ride itself. Somehow we made it through, then hustled to Tower of Terror, as hubby had sworn to me that its standby line never gets that bad. Maybe not when he comes to the park late, but at this point it was already sitting at half an hour and poised to keep an upward climb as more droves of tourists headed to that end of the park. Grudgingly I agreed to wait since I knew it would only get worse. I figured that we could get a Tower Fastpass before lunch and ride it again on our way out.

Next up, we decided to go back to Toy Story to see if the singles line had opened. They need something like the Bat Signal so you could tell from any part of the park rather than having to hike over and find out. On the way is One Man's Dream, a collection of Disney-related models and memorabilia, capped with a movie about Walt Disney's life. I'd been thinking about stopping in at some point if we needed to kill time...at the very least it's air conditioned, and I do enjoy the memorabilia. It brings flashbacks to Sunday nights gathered around the Radiation King brand television set watching the Wonderful World of Color. I figured we'd do that later, but as we approached I noticed the greeter at the door beckoning people inside.

That might not sound like an enticement for most people, but something clicked in my mind. It's the Year of a Million Dreams giveaway, and I've heard that when the Dream Team is doing a giveaway in a less-traveled attraction, the greeters will sometimes wave people in. They won't say why, but if you're savvy you will heed their siren call. I told hubby, "I think we should see One Man's Dream now."

He looked at me as though I was nuts, but he knows there is usually a method to my madness so he tailed me inside. Sure enough, there was the Dream Team! They had on their white "we're giving away stuff" vests and were shouldering black gift bags. It turned out that they were giving away the best gift for a crowded day: Dream Fastpasses. Sometimes they give away lanyards or hats, but the Fastpasses are perfect when line times are rapidly rising and the park is a wall of sweaty humanity. With a Dream Fastpass, you get one ride via the Fastpass line on all the FP attractions. In the Studio, that includes some good stuff like Tower of Terror, Rockin' Rollercoaster, and the ever-popular Toy Story Mania, as well as assorted other stuff like Voyage of the Little Mermaid, Star Tours, and the Indiana Jones and Motorcars stunt shows.

We proudly donned our Fastpasses; our day's schedule had suddenly been rewritten. It was funny to watch other guests come in after us and look confused as the Dream Team asked them to step aside so they could get their awards. Amazingly, I think that a lot of people come to WDW totally away of the Year of a Million Dreams giveaway. I guess it shouldn't surprise me since Fastpasses have been around for years, yet I see people constantly who have no idea what those are either.

We ended up getting three rides on Toy Story Mania: singles line (in the brief period it was open...and our luck continued, as hubby and I somehow both ended up in the same car, which is virtually impossible as a single rider), regular Fastpass, and Dream Fastpass. Before lunch, hubby got Tower Fastpasses, so we got in two more rides there. We saw Little Mermaid and did Star Tours too. When I'm there in the off season, Star Tours usually has no line; with the July crowd, it was actually up to half an hour. We did Rockin' Rollercoaster too; the standby there was something like 75 minutes.

Our lunch at Sci Fi was very pleasant. Their food is nothing to write home about, but you eat in a "drive in theater" at tables shaped like cars. They show all sorts of funny trailers for bad 50s sci fi movies. My favorite was "Plan 9 From Outer Space," since I love Ed Wood. I had a burger and hubby had pastrami.

If we'd gone with our initial plan, we would probably have been out of the park shortly after noon. With our new freedom to ride everything, we ended up sticking around till nearly 3 p.m. Problem was, we could see dark clouds forming in the sky and hear the distant rumble of thunder. A Florida afternoon thunderstorm was brewing, and it looked like it would be a close call on whether or not we could make it to the parking lot before the heavens let loose.

Fortunately luck was still with us. We made it to Kitt and were out on World Drive headed back to Celebration before raindrops started spitting on the windshield. What had started out as a two-to-three-ride morning whirlwind had been drawn out into nearly six hours of park time and three rides on Toy Story, three on Tower, one on Rockin' Roller Coaster, one on Star Tours, and the Little Mermaid show. Not bad for mid-July, especially with countless tour groups lurking around.

It made me think of one Dream Team member's comment to another guest. A few more people had walked in behind us, and I heard him tell them, "Guess what you won today? You won the gift of time." A perfect description of Dream Fastpasses for sure.

Celebration or Seattle?

By the amount of rain we've been getting lately, I've been wondering whether I'm in Celebration or Seattle. I can barely remember the last rain-free day we've had. Every afternoon and evening (if not earlier), we're enveloped in the midst of the thunderstorm. I'm beginning to forget what a blue sky looks like since I'm so used to puffy gray clouds.

Really, it's not all that unusual for this time of the year, and it's much better than a dry spell and increased fire danger. I can handle the thunderstorms as long as we don't have any hurricane threats. So far, all has been quiet out in the Atlantic.

The rain is much preferable to the snow that I had to deal with in Chicago. I'd rather tote an umbrella than a shovel and drive on wet pavement instead of ice, and you don't have to scrape raindrops off the windshield. Also, our rainy season whizzes by much past than the typical Midwest winter. Summer always seems to fly, and with it go the daily thunderstorms. In contrast, a Chicago winter drags on for months and month. Then, just when you think you're safe, you get a March blizzard. I'll take the storms and the lightning light shows any day!

The only bummer about the rain is that it inhibits our theme park visits. We avoid Disney like the plague in the peak season, other than an occasionaly brief visit in the morning or evening. But we have our Universal Premier Passes, which means front-of-the-line afer 4 p.m. Unfortunately, for the last couple of weeks the rains have been here after 4 too. It's just not worth it to slog around the park in a soggy rain poncho...yuck.

My husband's early afternoon water park visits have been curtailed too. He waits until much of the tourist crowd has gone back to their hotel rooms to nurse their sunburns. The last couple of hours usually mean managable lines, even in the summertime. Rain isn't a problem since you're wet already, but the water parks get shut down at the first hint of lightning. Since most summertime Florida rains are accompanied by copious amounts of thunder and lightning, that means a frequent call of "Everybody out of the pool."

I feel sorry for the tourists who are pretty much locked into summer visits. Usually you can work around the rain; when hubby and I were visitors ourselves, we were very good at working our meals around the afternoon storms. They would whip up, rage fiercely, and be done by the time we had finished our meal. Unfortunately that wouldn't work with our current rain schedule, which starts in the afternoon and runs through the most of the evening lately.

Oh well, I know it's just part of the cycle and the price of living in the tropics. Whenever I get too depressed about being housebound by a deluge of rain, I'll just remind myself that it could be snow!